After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
he told me I talked like a deaf person
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
