when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
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