it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
We need to get me chipped asap
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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