Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
