is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
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