the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
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