JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
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