I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
