Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Randomize
