I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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