On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
