Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize