it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
Randomize
