Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Randomize
