You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Randomize
