I puked a lego.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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