Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize
