The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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