you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
Randomize
