That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
