i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
