Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
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