We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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