whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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