Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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