I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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