I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
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