What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize