please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
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