omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
She said her name was "party"
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
I will pee on everything he values.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
