My brain says no but my pants say off.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize
