I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
Randomize
