And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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