Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
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