The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
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