It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Congratulations! We have a period
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Randomize
