dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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