Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
