Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
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