In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Randomize