It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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