Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
