hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
