Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize