Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
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