Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
Randomize
