I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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