can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
so much tequila, so little girl.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
