so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
Randomize
