Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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