whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
Randomize
